Sunday, June 22, 2014

Leg dilema.

I'll admit it: I was on OkCupid for a little while. It was maybe 40% because of boredom, 50% morbid curiosity, and 10% genuine interest and seeing what was out there. I learned a few valuable things during my time on the site:

  • My sense of humor doesn't really translate to text.
  • If I were to approach the profile with the same type of honesty that men do, I would look crazy or bitchy.
  • I don't actually like online dating.

There was, however, one huge and shocking thing I learned: that most men think "that women have an obligation to keep their legs shaved." The way OkCupid structures their question and answer portion, you answer the question and then choose what the ideal answer for a potential match would be. When you're looking through the list of questions you have both answered, if you answered a question in a way they find unacceptable, your answer is highlighted in red. If they answered in a way you find unacceptable, their answer is highlighted in red. For probably 90% of matches, this is what I saw:

Do women have the obligation to keep their legs shaved?
HIM: Yes.
ME: No.
        They're my legs. I'm not going to get on your case about overgrown ear hair or wearing a t-shirt        15 times before washing it; so lay off my legs. But for the sake of being forthcoming, I do prefer          to keep them shaved, but I repeat: they're mine to decide what to do with.

Theirs were highlighted in red because I had selected "yes" as an unacceptable answer for a potential match. There is a little box to add explanations, so I made one.

Now that we all understand how its done, let me tell you why I think its bullshit.

~Either you truly think I'm obligated to keep them shaved..... or you don't really know what obligated means and didn't bother to Google it. Either way, not good, not happening.

~They're my legs. Not your legs. I am the sole decision-maker when it comes to the state of how I keep my body.

~I did read ONE acceptable explanation. He said something like "I wouldn't say women are obligated, but I have a strong preference for women who keep their legs shaved."

Now, I get that a lot of guys may have been answering the question as if it were "Do you prefer shaved or unshaven legs?" But that is not how the question was worded. They all look kind of like jerks for answering that way.

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